Archives for November 3, 2024

It’s about the Journey

By Paul Monahan, Graves Golf Mental Game Coach

In early 2015, I realized that I had visited nearly all 50 states in America….all except Idaho and Montana. It occurred to me that I would be turning 50 years old that year – and I had this idea that if I got a little intentional, I could complete the 50 States x 50 Race” (…I think I made up) by visiting all 50 states before I turned 50. What an incredible accomplishment that would be! Right?

I worked through the logistics: I would fly to Spokane, WA then drive to Coeur d’Alene, ID. While there, I could play some golf, and then make my way over to Montana…only a short distance from Coeur d’Alene. My buddy Jon from high school, – always up for an adventure – would come with me. The trip was on.

So, in May of that year, Jon and I hopped on a flight and we headed out on our adventure. On day one we travelled to Idaho (#49…check!). On day two, we played golf at the Coeur d’Alene Resort (…famous for its moveable island green. Yes…I got the certificate!). And on day three we drove an hour or so East to the Montana border. (#50…check!) The race was over. I won!

Cue the big celebration, right? The elation. The pure joy. The confetti.

Well… what I experienced was a bit different. And frankly it was a bit of a letdown.

There was no there there. I can’t even tell you how ridiculous I felt. I said to myself “ You did what? Travelled all this way just to be able to tell your friends you travelled to 50 states!?”  (… this whole essay is starting to feel like a giant humble brag.)

But the truth is that I had an amazing three days with a life-long buddy who enjoys many of the things I do. Golf, adventure, great conversations about the meaning of life…etc. That was where the joy and happiness was for me. And if I reflect on my journey through the other 48 states, I can think of tons of great memories and experiences as well.

So, by the time I got to the Montana border, the “prize” didn’t matter as much.

The point is this: it’s not about the destination – it’s about the journey. Always has been. Always will be.

When I was younger, I thought that was just another platitude. Pure garbage. A phrase invented by people who were too afraid or too timid to do what it took to get themselves across the finish line.

I don’t believe that anymore. I believe that I am most energized when I am working toward something – engaged purposefully in pursuit of a goal, dream, or defined outcome. On the path. On the journey.

I am immensely satisfied when I arrive at my goals… and even happy or elated sometimes. (Ask me about my experiences walking across the Grand Canyon’s Rim-to-Rim route the next time you see me.) But looking back, it really WAS the journey that mattered most. And looking ahead, I believe it really IS the journey that matters most.

The journey is what points you. It is what energizes you, challenges you, and puts you into the kind of productive struggle that creates growth. (Thank you, Dan Coyle.)

Learning to play golf at a higher level the way you are doing it IS a journey. Remember to enjoy it. Relish it. Know what it is – and what it is not. It IS an amazing adventure of learning and growth. It is NOT your identity. It is NOT an obstacle to be overcome – but an experience to move through that will change you forever.

In Jordan Petersons’ book Beyond Order, he says that “You are not only something that is. You are something that is becoming…”

Humans are teleological… we must have purpose. We must have targets. We must be aimed at a destination…and be traveling in that direction. It is how we are wired. But what truly brings joy, satisfaction and happiness to a life is not necessarily arriving at some pre-ordained goal, but rather what we experience along the journey itself.

The next time you are in struggle, experiencing frustration about your game or about that shot that just went sideways, stop. Take a deep breath and remind yourself:  “It’s the journey.” Then consider the gift inherent in that moment …how that moment will make you stronger, smarter, and more able to complete the journey you are on. Remember that you are becoming… one little step at a time.

Safe travels!

-Paul

Be Willing to Be Stupid – Tips for Improving Part # 2

By Tim Graves, PGA

Hopefully, you were able to read last month’s practice tip (October 2024 Update) – Tips for Improving (Part 1).

In this practice tip we discussed how we work with our students to create new habits rather than breaking old habits. It is essentially impossible to break bad habits (our mind/body is not set up that way) … but we are set up to be able to create new habits and ultimately make changes/create new movements, etc. we want.

We talked about a book we strongly recommend – The Little Book of Talent / 52 Tips for Improving Your Skills by Daniel Coyle

It is described as a manual for building a faster brain and a better you. It is an easy-to-use hand book of scientifically proven, field tested methods to improve your skills – your skills, your kids’ skills, your organization’s skills – in sports, music, art, math and business. The product of five years of reporting from the world’s greatest talent hotbeds and interviews with successful master coaches, it distills the daunting complexity of skill development into 52 clear, concise directives. Whether you are 10 or 100, this is an essential guide for anyone who ever asked, “How do I get better?”

9780345530257

The last instructional newsletter (Tips for Improvement Part 1) we talked about the following tips:

1.  Staring at who you want to become.

2.  Spending 15 minutes a day engraving the skills on your brain.

3.  Stealing without apology.

4.   Buying (and keeping) a notebook.

This instructional newsletter (Part 2) we cover the next 4 tips for improving your skills and relate them to you learning/working on your single plane swing.

5. Be Willing To Be Stupid

Feeling stupid is no fun.  But being willing to be stupid – in other words, being willing to risk the emotional pain of making mistakes – is absolutely essential, because reaching, failing, and reaching again is the way your brain grows and forms new connections.

When it comes to developing talent, remember, mistakes are not really mistakes, but rather they are guideposts you use to get better.

This is a topic we discuss often at our schools and clinics. When you are making changes in your golf swing, it should be uncomfortable at first and you will not hit it well at first. You shouldn’t – many feel they are making “mistakes” and feel “stupid” when they do this. But this shows you are making changes and something EVERYONE will go through when they are making changes and creating new habits. If you are willing to make “mistakes” – miss hit shots when you first start to make changes, “willing to be stupid” as Mr. Coyle calls it…. you will create new habits. If not, the process will take MUCH longer, if not hindered all together.

6. Choose Spartan Over Luxurious

We love comfort. We love state-of-the-are practice facilities, oak-paneled corner offices, spotless locker rooms, and fluffy towels. Which is a shame, because luxury is a motivational narcotic: It signals our unconscious minds to give less effort. It whisper’s, Relax, you’ve made it…

The point of this tip is not moral; it’s neural. Simple, humble spaces help focus attention on the deep-practice task at hand; reaching and repeating and struggling. When given the choice between luxurious and spartan, choose spartan….  Your unconscious mind will thank you.

This is actually one of my favorite tips in the Little Book of Talent. Do I like fancy country clubs, fancy ranges, fancy practice areas – ABSOLUTELY! But, there is no question, my focus suffers big time when I’m in that environment. In fact, when I grew up hitting golf balls, and practicing in high school, in college and when I was starting on the mini – tours, 90% of the time I hit balls (practiced) in a field hitting my own golf balls out of my shag bag. And I guarantee my improvement was increased dramatically as my focus had to stay alert as when you are hitting your own balls, you must shag your own golf balls. If you loose focus, it is absolutely no fun shagging those balls….

I always recommend to my students (especially younger high school and college students) if you want to dramatically improve your quality of practice – hit your own golf balls – whether you are chipping, pitching, or working on your full swing, if you have the opportunity to hit your own balls – I strongly recommend it.

7. Before You Start, Figure Out If It’s a Hard Skill or a Soft Skill

The first step toward building a skill (creating a new habit) is to figure out exactly what type of skill you’re building. Every skill (habit) falls into one of two catagories: hard skills or soft skills.

Hard, High-Precision Skills are actions that are performed as correctly and consistently as possible, every time. Hard Skills are about repeatable precision.

An example of a hard skill is creating new moves/working on new positions in your golf swing. Golf swing fundamentals are hard skills.

Soft, High-Flexibility Skills are those that have many paths to a good result, not just one. These skills aren’t about doing the same thing perfectly very time, but rather about being agile and interactive, reactive and making timely choices.

An example of soft skills is working on things that will help you on the course/on course type situations. Hitting shots into the wind, moving the ball right to left, or left to right, hitting different trajectories on golf shots, working on your short game (creating different shots around the green), etc. Soft skills tend to be more “feel” related and something that is reactive to the situation.

8. To Build Hard Skills, Work Like a Careful Carpenter

To develop reliable hard skills, you need to connect the right wires in your brain. In this, it helps to be careful, SLOW, and keenly attuned to errors. To work like a careful carpenter. Precision especially matters early on, because the first reps/swings establish a pathway for the future. Neurologists call this the “sled on the snowy hill” phenomenon. The first repetitions are like the first sled tracks on fresh snow. On subsequent tries, your sled will tend to follow those grooves.

When you are working on hard skills (working on your golf swing), be precise and measured. Go SLOWLY. Make one simple move (change) at a time, repeating and perfecting it before you move on. Learning fundamentals only seems boring – in fact, it’s the key movement of investment. If you build the right pathway now, you’ll save yourself a lot of time and trouble down the line.

This is EXACTLY why Todd and myself have worked so hard on creating and implementing our training aids and instructional videos.

These training aids and instructional videos are set up to help you act like a careful carpenter. They help you take the guess work out of practicing. Even if your focus starts to “lax” – they will help you keep on path.

Do not guess, do not question if you are doing it right or not.

As we say at all our schools and to all our students – a majority of typical golfers have no idea if they are on the path to improvement or not. Our students do not and will not have this problem. By following a model, studying and learning proper movement and using training aids to check and check often, you can guarantee you are building those hard skills (fundamentals) perfect – like a VERY careful carpenter.

Watch our next Newsletter (November Update) released in 2 weeks for continuation of this topic – Tips for Improving.

Please let me know your comments about these etips to timg@gravesgolf.com

I use these comments for future instructional etips, etc..

LEARN

THE

SWING

Join 1M+ Subscribers to get your FREE Video Quick Start Guide that reveals how to hit the ball farther and straighter more consistently from now on…

START YOUR NEW GOLF SWING