Archives for May 31, 2026

Struggle is Your Friend

By: Paul Monahan, Graves Golf Mental Game Coach

I hope you have had some great experiences on the golf course this year.

However, I know that if you are at all like me, you may be experiencing some struggle in your game right now.

Or, perhaps your game is solid, but you just can’t seem to put it together on the course, or in competitive events – where it seems to matter most.

I totally get that.

Today I went back in the blogs to find this message about struggle and it’s value on our journey to mastery.

Check it out here:

The Sun’ll Come Out…

“It’s always darkest before the sunrise.”

Have you ever heard that before? I have. And honestly, I’m not sure if it’s technically true.

However I think that the metaphor still works for me. It goes something like this:

Occasionally, it seems like we will never emerge from our struggle. While plodding away in the darkness (a metaphor for struggle) things can begin to feel very heavy. And this can cause us to lose hope in ever transcending the darkness (or ultimately overcoming the struggle).

But then something magic happens. After working a long time on something, breakthroughs happen. Insights appear. Hope grows. The struggle ends.

And then the sun comes out. And life is good again.

My wife and I recently spent the weekend in Nashville with our son Kevin who is a young musician and producer. (It was dark and rainy in Nashville…which made me wish for the sun…and partially inspired the idea for this blog.)

For people like Kevin and his peers in the music biz – smart, talented people working very hard on their passions, but having not yet reached the level of success they are aiming to reach one day – the darkness of struggle can be an impediment to realizing dreams.

What is so inspiring about being around Kevin and his music-industry friends though, is that they are so committed to the work that they never stop moving forward. Yes…they are tempted sometimes to compare themselves to others…but the ones who thrive in these conditions are dedicated to the process of improvement. They just don’t get stuck (very often – or for very long) in WHERE they are at any given time. They TRUST in the process so much that in essence, success is already theirs.

Even if it seems dark right now. Even if there is no guarantee that “the sun will out” on their career.

And this is exactly as it should be. Struggle is necessary to grow talent.

Dan Coyle (Author, Cleveland, OH resident and friend to the Moe Norman Single Plane Swing Community) revealed a decade ago in his book The Talent Code the importance of embracing struggle when learning new skills. Coyle references advances in science which show that struggle actually BUILDS and REINFORCES the physical network of neurons in our brain which allow us to successfully build the skill needed to perform at high levels.

(In The Talent Code, Coyle also reveals the importance in practice.)

As you think about preparing for another year of golf, you no doubt may be faced with the idea of struggle as you work on matching the Single Plane Swing model and ultimately plaingy better golf.

Since we never know how long this is going to take – there are many factors and variables to consider – it certainly can seem like the struggle to improve (or maybe just stink a little less?)  is never-ending. If you are feeling that, I want you to know that that is ok.

You are exactly where you should be.

Having said that, there are a couple things you can do.

  • Stop comparing yourself to other golfers. Compare yourself today to the golfer you were yesterday. This is the only comparison that matters.
  • Reframe the Single Plane Swing journey. Remember that it is not about IF you can get this…it’s only about WHEN. (And then drop any attachment you have to WHEN success will come for you. )
  • When things get really heavy for you, step outside of yourself and focus on serving others for a little while. (When we operate from the perspective of “service to others,” our mindset is much more positive and productive.)
  • Enjoy the journey. The small victories.
  • Know that success is already yours. And remember that growth comes from struggle.

Struggle is what is required for growth. Struggle is what is required to layer your neurotransmitters with the amazing brain protein sheath (myelin) that will make the changes to your swing long-lasting. Struggle in practice is what is required to ensure that you can take your swing onto the course and actually play better.

So if it feels a little “dark” right now. That’s ok. It’s actually supposed to.

With some continued focus, intentionality and practice and maybe a little reframing, the sun’ll come out for you and your swing. I have no doubt.

Have a great week!

-Paul

Making Your Lob Wedge Your Best Friend

By Tim Graves, PGA

First, I want to say, I believe the lob wedge is one of the most important clubs in your bag.

In fact, I believe it is the 3rd most important club in your bag (refer to past e-tips for #1 (Putter) and # 2 (Driver).

Besides your putter and your driver, this is probably the club you will use the most in a given round… if you know how to use it and use it correctly…

The perfect Lob Wedge: The perfect lob wedge (in my opinion) has the following characteristics:

  1. 58* of loft or more
  2. Forged type club (the softest material in a wedge that helps create spin and a very soft feel at impact – allows for the ball to land softly on the green).
  3. C – type grind on the sole of the club. This grind on the club allows to hit off of all different surfaces (soft, hard, etc..) and allows for different ball positions instance to hit low to high (lob) type shots. The C type grind on the sole keeps the leading edge of the club low to the ground when the ball position is “pushed forward” for higher / lob type shots.
  4. Medium to Wide sole on the club – the wider the sole – the easier it is to “slide” across tight lies.
  5. Needs to have swing weight heavier than most clubs in bag besides the sand wedge (swing weight typically between D-4 and D-6) – most lob wedges are built this way as the added weight helps cut through many surfaces (high grass, sand, etc..) and helps create better “feel” around the greens.
  6. Steel shafted. Again – the weight helps as described.
  7. Slightly rounded leading edge on the club – only slight, but this slight rounding also helps cut through different surfaces.
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How to play the Lob Wedge:

For a full shot, (for many ranges from 30 to 60 yards, maybe slightly longer) – the ball is placed in the middle of the stance and swung with a good on the plane single plane swing. (Like any other club in the bag – ball position center of stance).

For a short pitch or high lofted shot (not lob or flop shot yet…):

  1. The ball is placed slightly forward in the stance (forward of center). As higher you want the ball – the more forward you put in the stance.
  2. The weight (body’s weight distribution) is 50/50. You do not put more weight on the lead foot.
  3. Stance is slightly open – about 10 to 20* at max.
  4. The hands are slightly ahead of the ball at set up.
  5. Choke down slightly for more control and better feel.
  6. You swing the club with VERY soft hands. This means light grip pressure on the club.
  7. You work on the fold/fold type swing. Meaning you fold your trail arm in the backswing and lead arm in the through the swing. Nice and easy….
  8. You accelerate through the shot – your hands should finish at shoulder level or above. If you think the swing is too long for the shot – shorten the backswing, but still keep a solid and extended through the swing.
  9. Swing toward the hole – as Moe said: “Try to pull the flag out with the head of the club”. This was his analogy of making sure the club is swung down the line toward the hole.
  10. Make sure the weight is evenly distributed throughout the shot and the feet stay down throughout the shot.

For a flop shot (high lofted short shot): Follow the points above except the following:

  1. Ball position – as forward in stance as comfortable. Off lead heel or further forward is good.
  2. The weight distribution is still 50/50 or slightly toward the back foot. Keep weight balanced throughout the shot.
  3. The club slides under the ball… Think of sliding under the ball rather than hitting down on the shot.

To be honest, after teaching 1,000s of students in the past, this is always a difficult shot to master – it takes time, but once you get the “feeling” it actually becomes pretty easy and a great “shot saver” in the round. Here are a few faults many students have difficulty with while they are trying to learn the flop shot:

  1. Weight transfer – you need to keep your weight back to center during the shot – exaggerate this as much as possible. It is almost impossible to get the club to slide under the ball if you are transferring your weight too much forward.
  2. SOFT HANDS – if you think you have lightened the grip pressure enough – do it some more. The softer the grip pressure the easier it is to fold/fold in the shot which brings consistency and great feel with this shot.
  3. Acceleration – shorten the backswing enough that you feel you need to be pretty aggressive in the through the swing. A backswing that is too long creates deceleration in the through swing which leads to fat and/or thin shots.
  4. The swing toward the hole – great area to practice on swinging toward the target. Chances are if you are coming across your full shots (cut/slice) you are also doing the same in your pitching/flop shots.

In a good high pitch/flop shot the ball should land relatively soft on the green with minimal roll. In fact, if you listen to the shot, you will hear a “thud” when it hits the green. A good shot comes in soft, has minimal role… many pros call it landing like a “butterfly with sore feet”.

Hopefully, this helps those who are looking to help their short game – especially that all needed lob shot around the green.

Please feel free to contact me at timg@gravesgolf.com with any short game questions, questions about your wedges or any other club fitting questions.

Remember my saying: “I’ve never seen a good player with a bad short game and have never seen a bad player with a good short game.”

For your perfect wedge fit: CLICK HERE

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